I was a happy kid, then things started happening within my family, things that my siblings did, I realised their cruelty & viciousness was a part of the core of their being, overlaid by a self-image of strength & wisdom, courage & kindness.

This falsity persists, they've now become closer to each other due to their despite of me, maybe that's a good thing for them, in the long run, but it's certainly no fun for me.. My Mum is no longer capable of telling them to back-off & they have zero regard for my ideas, my wishes, my history as Mum's long-term carer, their guilt & shame over their neglect of Mum, forces them to hate me for who I am, which is very tiring, I am so very tired.. of it all.. I just want to sleep & not wake-up..